THE ART OF…NOSE PICKING. 5 WAYS TO PICK YOUR NOSE WITHOUT GETTING CAUGHT DOING SO.

I never pick my nose, ever. Or well, I never let anyone catch me. And it is high time for you booger hunters to sharpen your technique and stop with the amateurish public digging when everyone around can spot you. What are you? Some kind of disgusting animal? Well, yes, but why confirm what we know and suppress? 
And so just for you we picked five simple ways to pick, scratch and explore your nose without attracting attention to the fact that you're at it.



The thinker :: A philosophical nose-picking technique that requires patience and gentle movements. Ponder the wonders of the world while you dig with your pinky, yet appear extremely intelligent. 



The talented :: Yes you might draw some attention with this technique, but only to showcase a new and extraordinary talent you just discovered. Pick the closest wind instrument you can put your hands on. It can be a piccolo or bagpipes for all that matter, don't restrict yourself. Stick it in and do your thing.



The distracter :: Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it Rick Astley back from oblivion doing the Macarena? Whatever it is, this nose picking technique needs good improvising skills and quick fingers. After all, your crowd will be distracted for only a few seconds if Rick Astley was to come back.  



The master, a.k.a. the 'no hands' :: Not everyone can pull this as it requires some bloody flexible face muscles. Indeed an advanced technique that gives people no clue of what you are doing. However, the downside - people will have no fucking clue of what the fuck you are doing. Weirdo. 



The undercover :: Get your face under a cover and your hands on the go. Do it with the help of your shirt or sweater and call it a new dressing trend. Do it under a burqa and call it freedom of religion. No one can say anything to that.


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Happy picking Everybody! 
What's your technique? The thinker? The master? or the undercover?
If we forgot mentioning any other technique please feel free to comment bellow :-)



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3 comments:

  1. That's really great and useful, but I'm sure you know that Rick Astley never did the Macarena.

    ReplyDelete
  2. some people will do whatever it takes.

    ReplyDelete
  3. i saw somewhere that Rick Astley`s hair is going on tour and he is also very close to finishing an autobiography "The Rick and I"

    ReplyDelete